Happy birthday to me! Today I turn 40. Such an epic milestone. I could have told you with great certainty at every year of my life what I would be doing at age 40 and it would never have included breastfeeding an almost 5-year-old and a 2-year-old, being a stay-at-home mom and mommy blogging. [Read more…]
We live in a culture where we are constantly pressured to push our kids to “grow up.” This is often the argument for weaning, “They need to grow up sometime!” I’ve even got feedback for the vocabulary I use to describe my kids, “baby versus toddler versus small child.” And anyone who is not pushing their child to grow up is trying to “keep” them young. What is the big rush? They are going to grow up. Seriously, you don’t need to push them. Actually pushing too hard can cause anxiety and distrust in the world. They will just grow. It’s nature. I will not wean my child simply because he breastfeeds at an older age than makes you comfortable. It works for us, it is what I believe he needs and he likes it! I am not “keeping” him breastfeeding. He likes it, he initiates it and, even after hard work to establish boundaries to keep me sane nursing 2 kids, he keeps coming back. I do not force it to continue and I will not force it to end. He won’t breastfeed when he is in college, not that you really need to care about what my child does. Of all the things going on with kids and in the world at large, people trip about this. I don’t get it. How can anyone look at this and think it is wrong?
My Dear Critic,
I posted this photo on Instagram, that social media platform with the reputation of being drama-free. I received comments such as, “that’s disgusting,” “so gross,” “you’re sick,” etc. Nothing we haven’t heard before on social media, where people can comment without [Read more…]
This is Exley. He is 20 months old. He breastfeeds a lot. Like 7,582 times during the day and 10,498 times during the night. We share a bed so he wakes up, latches on and goes back to sleep. He nurses to sleep, to wake up, for comfort, before he eats, after he eats, when he’s resting and all other times too. He is loud. His voice booms in your chest and pierces your ears. He likes to follow his big brother around. Exley thinks he can do everything his big brother can do and falling on his head never holds him back. People often wonder if I get criticized for breastfeeding both Exley and his big brother, Jack (4.5 years old). I do online, but not in my real life. I wouldn’t keep critics in my life anyway. My close friends and family support my decision. Extended family and acquaintances seem to keep comments to themselves if they have any. I plan to breastfeed both of them as long as they want. It’s not always fun, but it works for us. It’s far more than food; it’s comfort, security, attachment, bonding and nurturance. I believe that allowing them to wean in their own time will lead to independence, high self-esteem, health and a sense of connection to their family and the world. I don’t think nursing Jack takes anything away from Exley. I think Exley gains a unique relationship with his brother along with all the other “perks” of breastfeeding.
This is Jack. He’s 4.5 years old. He nurses to sleep and for comfort, a couple times a day, but if it were up to him it would be 75 times a day! He likes to be worn in a toddler carrier if we are in a new or loud place. He likes trucks, Rescue Bots and telling stories. He has ideas for books and plays. He loves to run. He’s sensitive, talkative and funny. Breastfeeding has given him nothing but milk, love, nurturance, security, comfort, safety and attachment which will lead to independence, courage, health, self esteem and emotional security.
By Abby Theuring
I’ve pretty much heard it all by now. “I’m all for breastfeeding, but… as long as you do it in private, as long as you go to the bathroom, as long as you cover, as long as I don’t have to see it.” “I don’t want my kids/husband to see that.” “That’s so gross.” “Why can’t you just put it in a cup?” And on and on with the stipulations that people love to put on other people’s behavior. [Read more…]