A resource to inspire, inform and empower parents.

Five Effing Monkeys

I am not at all above getting mind numbingly annoyed with a baby who won’t go to sleep. Especially when that baby is no longer a baby, but still doesn’t sleep. When I am trying my hardest to keep my cool I find it can be therapeutic to just let slide an inappropriate verse of my favorite song. I’ve been singing this little ditty since he was born.

Five little fucking monkeys jumping on the fucking bed
One fell off and bumped his fucking head
Mama called the fucking doctor
And the fucking doctor said
“No more fucking monkeys jumping on the fucking bed!”

Abby Theuring, MSW