A resource to inspire, inform and empower parents.

There’s No Such Thing As a “Former” Breastfeeder

I see this a lot. A mom finishes breastfeeding and then she posts on our wall or in a breastfeeding support group that she is leaving because she no longer belongs.


That is not true. Actually if you are totally done breastfeeding then you are the expert! You have so much valuable information to pass on to others. You have done it from beginning to end! No matter what happened during your journey you are sitting on some seriously helpful information for another mom. Please stay and connect with other moms. Pick your favorite breastfeeding group and stay! Be the mom that’s been there through it all. 

My Mom on the right nursing my sister. Her sister (my aunt) on the left nursing my cousin. Both woman are deceased. The babies are 42 now. Pic from 1976. Photo shared by Virginia. 

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5 Breastfeeding Tips to Help You Get Through the Night

Nothing prepares you for being a parent. While the first few weeks and months are unforgettable they are also incredibly exhausting.

Amongst all the excitement and the attention given to the newborn, something often gets forgotten, that’s the health of one very important person, you – the mom. And as you have a little one to care for now, nothing is as essential as sustaining your own physical and mental health. [Read more…]

Breastfeeding: You Never Know When It’s the Last Time

“I feel like Jack is going to be one of those kids that breastfeeds until 7 years old,” I said to my husband one day when Jack was around 1 year old. I had been learning a lot about breastfeeding, mostly through the moms at The Badass Breastfeeder Facebook community. I learned that kids who are not weaned early can breastfeed anywhere from 2.5 to 7 years old. Before kids it would have completely freaked me out. Now that I had celebrated my very first nursiversary, after fighting tooth and nail to save what seemed like a doomed breastfeeding relationship, I couldn’t imagine why on earth I would ever wean him. My husband took a bit longer to adjust to the idea of coloring so outside the box, but ultimately we both felt that what helps Jack is much more important than anyone else’s opinion.

Abby Theuring, The Badass Breastfeeder, breastfeeding Jack. [Read more…]

Breastfeeding is Normal

Abby Theuring, The Badass Breastfeeder, breastfeeding in public, nursing in public

So here, let me explain something.

I think feet are gross. Like I really don’t like to look at feet. Summer comes and I’m all, “UGH, everyone is going to in sandals. Gross!” I really don’t care if you get pedicures or paint your toe nails a pretty color. I don’t like feet and I don’t want to see them.

So guess what? I look away. I simply turn my head and look away. I shut my mouth and don’t look.

I don’t say, “Hey! All you people need to wear boots all year long so that I don’t have to see your feet!” I don’t tell people that they can’t come outside with sandals on. I don’t tell people that they should hang out in dirty places and leave the clean places for only boot-wearing folks.

Get it? Breastfeeding is as normal as feet. If you don’t like it look away. You have no right to tell me to cover up or hide myself away. Shut your mouth and look away.

Breastfeeding, Breasts and Rules

Abby Theuring, The Badass Breastfeeder, tandem nursing

Rules. Man, I hate rules. Most rules are arbitrary; anchored in control and profit. Traffic rules that keep cars flowing and not hitting each other, fine, I get that. But there are some rules that we never question that are simply there to oppress and control people. Some of them are loved so dearly that we made them LAWS. Like laws regarding my nipples. In most places I can get a ticket or even arrested if my nipples are exposed! The “I” in this sentence is important because I am a female and if I were not I would not be able to write that sentence. If I were a male I would not have any laws regarding my nipples. I would not be able to find ANY laws regarding the control of my body. Well, you can piss off with your rules about my body! And what about these other rules that aren’t laws, but they are so ingrained in our culture that we don’t even need them to be laws because the citizens keep them alive through social norms? Like I need to wean my child at a certain age or I need to cover when breastfeeding in public. You can piss off with those too!

Photo by Ivette Ivens

Unsolicited Breastfeeding Comments

Abby Theuring, The Badass Breastfeeder

It’s worn out now, but this shirt used to say, “Human. Kind. Be both.” I think this is a good motto when going about life. I often see comments under breastfeeding posts (especially when the child is beyond infancy) that it’s “disgusting,” “ridiculous” or “inappropriate.” Listen up, these statements are subjective at best and totally insulting. You don’t get to hide behind “Well that’s just my opinion.” It’s not an opinion, it’s an insult. And you can take your insults and shove them. You are welcome to ask questions, we love to answer them and share our experiences. We are moms making decisions for our families just like you. It might not look the same as yours, but that doesn’t matter. And you should be capable of understanding that you are not in charge of anyone’s life but your own. We’ve got this. We promise.

Breastfeed to Sleep

Abby Theuring, The Badass Breastfeeder, breastfeeding her baby to sleep

Breastfeeding your child to sleep is not a bad habit, it will not create sleep problems and it is not spoiling your baby. You are providing a normal and natural way for your child to go to sleep. The suckling motion of nursing relaxes and soothes your child to sleep. Yes, I said “child” because this is not just for babies. Breastfeeding is far from just food. It’s one of those powers that makes you a super hero.

Breastfeeding and Boobs

Abby Theuring, The Badass Breastfeeder, breastfeeding in public

They are just boobs. Boobs in all their glory. Boobs are so awesome people just don’t even know it. They have so many uses. They are incredible! So then why is it that people freak out at the sight of a breastfeeding mother? Even go to such lengths to shield their children’s eyes! Yet we walk around the mall and flip through magazines with magnificent boobs on display and no one blinks.

My theory is that breasts have become so fetishized (as means of controlling women and our bodies) that when people see breastfeeding they see it as a sexual act. And therefore are repulsed by it.

The more we breastfeed in public and the more we question the insanity and the more we confront the dysfunction of society the better chance we have of our children and grandchildren growing up in a saner world.

Breastfeeding Is Your Journey and No One Else’s

Abby Theuring, The Badass Breastfeeder, extended breastfeeding

There is not a single voice that matters in this decision besides you and your child’s. A person wrote to me recently about how she had promised her husband that she would stop breastfeeding by 3 years old. Well, the child is now 3 years old and she does not want to stop breastfeeding, but her husband is pressuring her to stop. I told her that her husband’s opinion will matter when he is the one breastfeeding. Too harsh? No. A breastfeeding relationship belongs to the owner of the breast and the one suckling on said breast. Period.

Comparing Breastfeeding Experiences

Abby Theuring, The Badass Breastfeeder, tandem nursing, tandem breastfeeding

I’m sure you’ve heard about not comparing your child to another child. Every child develops differently and there is no way you can judge your baby’s development based on someone else’s baby.

So why do we do the same thing to ourselves? I have a friend who told me that breastfeeding was no problem for her at all. She never had any struggles and breastfed both of her children until they stopped on their own. It used to make me feel jealous and defensive to hear her talk about breastfeeding.

Then I realized that my journey is just as awesome. It’s different than hers. And it’s different than any other mother’s journey. It has been a roller coaster of emotions and problems from kicking formula supplements, to nursing aversion, to tandem feeding and breastfeeding while pregnant. I don’t see my breastfeeding journey with my boys as “problem free.” And I am proud of that now rather than jealous of others.

I have a unique story with my boys. We all do. No one’s story is more valuable than any other’s. This is one beautiful, crazy, messy life that I am proud to call my own and to share with my boys every day.